I don’t suggest getting a mental illness. At all. Not that you can help it, but y’know, I still don’t suggest it.
I gain weight at unhealthy rates. I feel melancholy more than I need to. I feel tired and exhausted at the mere thought of being with some people. Any slightly negative thing said against me is internalized and worked over in my brain until I wholly believe it, entirely engraned in my thinking.
I try my best to handle these symptoms, but the weight gain is hard when you don’t have energy and the getting energy is hard when you believe you don’t deserve anything.
Its just bad. Its bad and I hate it.
And probably the worst part is neurotypicals telling you all these other treatments you can try.
“Eat healthier!” I get suicidal thoughts if I work too much. Not enough money.
“Go to bed at regular hours!” So me already going to bed around 9-10PM isn’t enough?
“Wake up earlier!” You try that, see how it affects you.
“Think happy thoughts!” Thanks. Real helpful.
“Just try harder!” What do you think I’m doing? If your anwser is not ‘my best,’ you’re wrong.
I was talking to a friend who, like me, has a slew of mental health issues. She told me about one day how she just sat, fully clothed, in the tub. For hours. That was her best that day.
Our best differs from day to day. One day we may be able to get up and pretend to have a normal life as if we actually had one.
Other days, we can barely feed ourselves.
Its not pleasant. Just remember that. Its not plesant and you may not be helping, no matter how good your intentions are.